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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24046522">Tell Me To Leave</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/angrybirdcr/pseuds/angrybirdcr'>angrybirdcr</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M, Protective Steve Rogers, Steve Rogers &amp; Tony Stark Friendship, Steve Rogers Angst, Steve Rogers Feels, Steve Rogers Has Issues, Steve Rogers is Not a Virgin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 16:48:38</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,394</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24046522</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/angrybirdcr/pseuds/angrybirdcr</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve Rogers was the perfect boyfriend anyone could ever wish, until one day he starts to ghost you and you don’t know why. So, you know it’s time to confront him about it…</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Steve Rogers/Reader</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>39</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Tell Me To Leave</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This is part of Tumblr's @cevansgirl Writing Challenge for her 1500 Followers, which it was an absolute pleasure to be part of!<br/>PROMPT: “You can’t spend the rest of your life being afraid of people loving you”</p><p>SOUNDTRACK:<br/> “If you are gonna leave” –Emerson Hart-<br/>“Do I have to cry for you” –Nick Carter-</p><p>**DISCLAIMER: I don’t own any rights on any Marvel characters, this is for entertainment purposes only. I only own the rights to my own original characters.**</p><p>** Please DO NOT post any of my works on any other platform or site without my express written consent. Feel free to like and/or to comment. Thanks You!**</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>All the lights were turned off, only the dim moonlight was peeking through the windows. The dreadful silence echoing through every corner, only broken for a slight moment when opening the bottle on your hand, you swear that you could hear your heart beat ringing on your ears. You couldn’t take it anymore, his inexplicable absence was taking a toll on your soul. You entered the bedroom that you had once shared with him not that long ago, taking in the view with a sigh, the same space that was once filled by his presence, his laugh and his essence was now empty, it stabbed you like a dagger. Taking the picture from your night table, you seat next to your bed with your knees up to your chest, setting your half drank glass on your side. You caressed his face as if wishing that he could feel your touch, you trace your fingers through his body as if trying to feel him again…you look at his hand resting on your waist as you laid yours on his chest, his eyes lovingly lost into yours, his warm smile across his face. It was the day that he had asked you to be his girlfriend and you had joyfully said yes, it had been one of the happiest days of your life, right after the day you met him at that same place. The memories painfully flooding you like a wild fire expanding through your chest. You let out a loud sob and the dam broke, your tears uncontrollably falling down your cheeks…</p><p>You couldn’t understand, what happened? Where had everything started to go sideways? From the first moment that you met he had been nothing but a sweet gentleman; he had open the doors for you, he had given you his hand to get up or down from stairs, he had bring you your favorite flowers or food without any special occasion, he had pick you up from work, he had taken you out on dates whenever he wasn’t away on a mission, he had never touch you unless you started it…He was simply amazing, he blamed his morals and values on his 1940’s upbringing which you honestly didn’t care.</p><p>He had come to call your place “home”, he’d come late at night and you’d tend his injuries. You had spent lazy Sundays watching Netflix and chill, on the literal meaning of the phrase, he had said he had a lot to catch up with. You had spent hours talking about the nice things from the past and everything that had changed since then. He didn’t mind at all hearing you venting out about another terrible day at the office dealing with your annoying boss and angry customers. You both just laughed and blushed at the fact that you were discussing about such a banality while he was out there saving the world.</p><p>He didn’t need to tell you but you had already guessed that dating Captain America himself would come with ups and downs, so you had kept your relationship under wraps for as long as possible. No matter what happened, he reassured you about the place you had on his life, if anything he was the epitome of a perfect boyfriend.  </p><p>In between sobs, you let out a smile at the thought. Then you remembered. A dark hole opened on the sky, heinous creatures descended from space, we realize we were not alone on the vast universe. ‘Aliens’ wrecking everything on their way while Earth’s Mightiest Heroes fought them with everything they had. It downed on you, that was the day that something switched and your world was turned upside down…</p><p>                                           ***    ***   ***<br/>
You tried to dodge the falling debris from the buildings, as you ran on the streets as far as you could go. Then you halted, you froze on your steps as you watched one of them coming your way, you fell to your knees closing your eyes and braced yourself for your impending death… But it didn’t happen. A strong arm wrapped around you lifted you up in the air, as you open your eyes to meet the deep blue warm eyes that you loved so much. You wrapped your arm around his neck holding for dear life, watching him spin around in mid-air throwing his shield at the beasts before landing a few meters away and recovering it again.</p><p>“Are you ok? Thank God!” His eyes full of fear and concern, while examining every part of your body as you remained speechless. “Hey! Look at me…Look at me… It’s ok, everything will be alright” He said caressing your face. “Get inside the station, you have to stay off the streets, do you understand?” He asked trying to make sure that I got him, I just nodded “Good, don’t stop! Now, Go!” He was about to start walking away as you let go of his hand, you finally reacted and called him up</p><p>“Steve!” He turned around and no words were not needed to be spoken, he pulled you closer and kissed you as if that was the last time he would do so, you finally let go when you were breathless. He reluctantly let you go, getting lost in the middle of dust, the falling glass and alien gun laser shots… You did as you were told. But little did you know it would only take a few moments before you saw him again. You had barely gotten inside the overly crowded station when they cornered you all like rats, bombs were set to blow you up any time now… the panic spread through your body, your breath became erratic and you knew you were having a panic attack, but there was nothing that you could do about it. Then you saw him, a tear streamed down your face, somehow, maybe by miracle your eyes found his again, this time his look was different. You couldn’t describe how, but it wasn’t the same, it was unreadable, maybe disappointment? Rage? You really couldn’t tell. He never stopped looking at you as you stood still seeing him beating them up one by one, his shield flying up everywhere, then he flew out the window as one of the bombs went off… We were alive, he had saved us again…</p><p>                                           ***    ***   ***<br/>
That day you had needed the comfort that only his embrace could give you but you couldn’t get a hold of him. You assumed that maybe he was still too busy tying loose ends, a thousand and one possibilities flooded your mind. One text was the harbinger of pain:</p><p>                “I’m sorry, I have a lot of work to do. Don’t wait for me”</p><p>You shrieked at the memory, throwing the picture against the wall, the frame’s glass breaking into a thousand pieces, fragments splattering all across the wooden floor, a small piece flying in the air and cutting your cheek…You didn’t care, you didn’t feel it, your chest tightened as you gripped your shirt looking for some kind of comfort. He had gone dead silent. Mandatory therapy was in place, you had barely mentioned your relationship when your therapist had suggested your boyfriend’s atypical behavior was either him being on denial or suffering some kind of PTSD as many others were having. Was it really that? Were the aliens to blame? Or was something else going on? Then she mention it, he could have simply resorted to ‘ghosting’ as a breaking up method. The world would have laughed at her if you had told her who your boyfriend was. Captain America would never do such thing, would he?</p><p>                                          ***    ***   ***<br/>
A month passed</p><p>New York was slowly trying to come back to normal. Main Subway stations and stores were running again. While you tried not to think about him but you couldn’t stop yourself from thinking about what if…? The wonderful man that you were in love with couldn’t have just vanished from your life. Your heart ached at the coldness of your bed at night, when you looked at his toothbrush or when you wore his favorite shirt. Then he showed up at your door, he leaned down and hugged you, he kissed your temple and led you to bed. No questions asked, a silent understanding of what both knew but didn’t have the courage to say. You let yourself go on his arms, he made you his like never before, his touch, his lips, his body, him… but he wasn’t there. An empty shell of what you both once were laid next to you; an unbearable tension that could be cut with a knife now filling every room. He didn’t call you the pet names as before, the flowers withered on the pot, the movie nights slowly replaced by speechless awkwardness and the romantic gestures a forgotten keepsake.</p><p>Another month passed</p><p>The Stark Relief Foundation was helping as much as possible, the tragedy written in history as a dreadful event that would never be forgotten. Families were still mourning the loss of their loved ones.</p><p>You? You never thought possible to be accompanied and still feeling so lonely. After that night, you barely got to see him again. The characteristic warmth from his arms was now as cold as the ice where he came from. You were afraid of what would happened, but you knew it was time to confront him.</p><p>“Steve, can we talk?” You asked sitting next to him on the couch</p><p>“What is it?” He shifted uncomfortably as if he was expecting your question</p><p>“I want you to tell me, is there something wrong?”</p><p>“What do you mean?”</p><p>“Maybe I’m the weak one on this relationship but I can’t take this anymore” You said trying to keep the tears pooling on your eyes away</p><p>“What are you talking about?” He said resting his arms on his knees without looking at you</p><p>“After the Manhattan Incident everything changed, you are not the same guy that I felt in love with. Are you having doubts about us? ”</p><p>“Why would you say that? I’m here aren’t I?” He stood up with his hands on his hips</p><p>“Steve, please don’t get mad.” You stood in front of him “Look at me…” You basically begged him until he finally met your teary eyes. “The coldness of your behavior towards me… I can’t bare it, so talk to me… I’ve been through heartbreak before…” He interrupted you saying “What do you want?” He turned around giving you his back, throwing his hands on the air.</p><p>“I want you to be honest with me, that’s it… If you’re going to leave then you better get going. I ain’t wasting no more time if this is not working for us” That was it, you were now crying and you didn’t care. He heard you, he turned to look at you with a pained expression.</p><p>“Do you want us to break up?” A frown drawn on his face</p><p>“Do you?” You held his hand not expecting his reaction</p><p>“I can’t believe we are having this conversation…” He pushed your hand away “I can’t do this right now…” He walked towards the door, you called his name but he didn’t turn around…</p><p>                                           ***    ***   ***<br/>
It didn’t matter anymore, he didn’t come back. Your world crumbled on your shoulders. There was no denying it, you never said it but you loved him, your whole heart beat for him. The longing had grown by the day. You had called, you had texted and you had lost hope. You had watched the sun and the moon go up and down losing the track of time. Your 9-5pm job became a burden, you tried to keep your feelings at bay but life wasn’t treating you any kinder for it. In between sobs, the inexplicable turmoil of emotions transformed in a storm as you received world shattering news. Whatever remaining amount of composure that you had left, was now gone. The past 3 weeks had been the longest ones of your entire life. You were tired but you wouldn’t go down without a fight, or so you thought when you walked into the Avengers Compound just a few hours ago before collapsing alone in your bedroom…</p><p>                                                ***    ***   ***<br/>
After an unwanted fight with the stubborn security guard, you were saved by Iron Man, Tony Stark himself appeared in front of you on the flesh. He somehow recognized your face from pictures that most likely Steve had showed him. He took you to their private lounge, talking with you while you awaited for him to arrive. Trying to put him a little bit up to speed about your relationship with him.</p><p>“You know, what happened there, it affected us all in more ways than we can explain. Coming from a narcissistic like me that means a lot.” He said in a very relaxed and confident way</p><p>“I wouldn’t be so harsh on yourself Mr. Stark. You saved the city after all…”</p><p>“I did! Didn’t I? But that’s not the issue at hand right now… Look Rogers truly is a man out time. There are things that he is terrible at, and I would bet my money that love is one of those things. I can’t tell you what to do, but he’s a hard guy to talk to. And talking about the King of Rome! That’s my cue to leave but if you need anything you already know how to reach me so don’t hesitate to do so at any time, ok princess!?” He said with a smirk, not even on a million year would I have imagined you would possess Tony Stark’s personal contact information. The bubble burst, as soon as he walked in and saw you, his jaw clenched and his smile dropped. He was clearly coming from a mission, still on his Captain America attire…</p><p>“What are you doing here?” Not even a warm or polite greeting</p><p>“I wanted to see you, can’t I?” You said with shocked expression on your face, letting your hands fall to your sides. “Last time I saw you, you left without saying a word. You didn’t answer my texts, emails, my calls went straight to voicemail… I knew you were alive for the news only! Isn’t that a little bit too cruel for you?” You let your true feelings come to the surface</p><p>“Well, I needed time, I’m sorry” He tensed up</p><p>“Is that it? Steve! You can’t be serious? For months you professed your undying loyalty and protection to me, you made yourself my knight in shining armor, not that I ever asked you anything of that. You did all of that by yourself. Then one day aliens decide to come and play a violent visit and then you suddenly turned into a cave man with me… You treated me less than a buttler and when things became rough you just disappeared!” There was no holding you back now “Why? Tell me, do I have to cry for you? You know that I can’t keep living like this, waiting for you to come not knowing when you are going to leave me again…”</p><p>“Do I have to say ‘I won’t let you get away’? Tell me what you want to do? Because I can’t live my life, the way you want me to… You know my life will never be anything remotely close to normal”</p><p>“When did I ever asked anything more from you? I knew you as Steve Rogers, The First Avenger, my heart and mind were ready for the impending pain at the most unexpected time. But that is not the way things panned out between us. YOU!” Your tone of voice in a higher pitch than usual, poking his chest with your finger. “You made me fall in love with you!”</p><p>“I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have done so… It’s been a very difficult year. I wasn’t ready to commit like that. Maybe I rushed into things…”</p><p>“You think? Everything that I ever asked you for was your love. For the day that you didn’t want me anymore to tell me before walking away… What happened? Where the caring, sweet and lovable gentleman went to? Where did our relationship crack?” Frustration, anger, disappointment, anything and everything was out of your mouth like piercing daggers to his chest. For the first time you wished that he could feel at least a fraction of the pain that engulfed you for the past few months… you saw his tears…</p><p>“I don’t know. I think the best it’s for us to never contact each other again…” His words split you in half, you felt as if he had dragged your heart out of your chest with his own hands, you rested your hand protectively on your stomach…</p><p>“Did you even love me?” You regretted asking that the moment the words were out of your mouth. He looked down to the floor, you didn’t need an answer… there was no shame on shouting now. “Did you even take the time to read my texts? Or the countless emails I sent you? My voicemails at least?” You let it out almost like a whisper with a cracking voice, as you looked at him as if looking for some sort of affirmation.</p><p>“No, I didn’t…” He said touching the back of his neck</p><p>“You didn’t…I shouldn’t have come down here.” It was now or never, you stood on your tippy toes, grabbing him by the neck. “Tell me you don’t love me” You whispered to his ear and with that you kissed him. His hands falling to your waist tightening his grip on you as you deepened the kiss, until you ran out of breath… “Tell me to leave”… He rested his forehead on yours before letting out the words you didn’t want to hear</p><p>“Now, you are free to go…” He didn’t need to tell you twice…</p><p>                                          ***    ***   ***<br/>
Your mind was running into overthinking a thousand miles an hour, the slow pass of time a torture, your eyelids started to feel heavy, did you cry that much already? Were you that exhausted? Or were you fainting? You didn’t know, you let yourself to fall to the side and the world went dark</p><p>                                      —– * ———–* ——<br/>
“What the hell was all of that?”</p><p>“Not now Tony…” He said walking towards the bar</p><p>“Oh no, right now it is buddy. You just broke that sweet innocent girl’s heart and I so much wish to know why? And please don’t give me the ‘it’s not her it’s me’ shitty speech” He said resting his elbow on the counter as Steve grabbed a beer</p><p>“I honestly don’t know”</p><p>“C’mmon capsicle! I know we are not that close as of yet, but considering the fact that you are now on charge of the team that I’m financing I think that I deserve a little bit more of trust. Don’t I?”</p><p>“So, who are you now? The love expert?”</p><p>“You know damn well I might be the last person on earth that should give any kind of romantic advice but look… I get it.”</p><p>“Do you?”</p><p>“I do. It doesn’t take a genius to guess that waking up 70 years later, knowing your significant ones have already passed away must have been hard for you but You can’t spend the rest of your life being afraid of people loving you. Or for you to love again. I know, you are scared to lose her. What happened out there in Midtown Manhattan? I felt the same way about Pepper. It changed us, there’s nothing that we can do about it but they don’t have to pay the price for it. That is just not fair for anyone, even I know that!”</p><p>“How do you know my relationship with her has anything to do with that?”</p><p>“Isn’t it obvious? Ok, ok… I admit she did spill some of the juice to me before you arrived… She said after the battle… you changed with her. You were colder than the ice where you woke up. Her words not mine!” He said putting his hands on the air in surrender</p><p>“She’s the best thing that has happened to me but when I saw her falling to her knees as those things were coming after her… I snapped. I couldn’t stop thinking what would have happened if I wasn’t there. And I know it wasn’t my fault or hers, but every time I’d see her I’d feel back there, powerless…” He said fidgeting his fingers on the bottle</p><p>“Did you ever tell her that?”</p><p>“No, I did not… Every time that I tried to say something, she would look at me with her bright eyes and I just lost it… ”</p><p>“What about the texts, calls and emails that she sent you?” He sighed. “Then why don’t you start by sitting back and start doing that?” He looked at him with a defiant glare until he started to move and do as told “I’m sure she had way more to say than what she did. Otherwise she wouldn’t have brought it up so many times…”</p><p>“Why wouldn’t she just tell me?” He said as he started to scroll down his phone, dialing his voicemail, he listened to the most recent message.</p><p>“Oh Cap… You have so much to learn!” Tony’s voice faded in the background as he played her message over and over again, his ears couldn’t believe what he was hearing “The day that we fully understand women, that will be doomsday my friend…” He did not pay any attention to his friend’s words, his mind fully focused on the phone. “Steve?  Are you ok? What did she say?”</p><p>“I gotta go…” He literally ran out of the building…</p><p>                                        —– * ———–* ——<br/>
You don’t know how much time have passed, you hear a knock coming from your front door… You slowly seat down, a hand on your throbbing head and the other one as your support, completely forgetting about the shattered glass… You walk barefoot until you make it to the door. You open it to find him standing in front of you, sweat running through his body, panting for air as if he had just run a marathon, well he had, you just didn’t know it yet. He looked at you with a broken expression across his face as he took in every detail from you; your disheveled hair, your puffy red eyes, a still fresh cut on your right cheek, his eyes fixated on your right hand, blood dripping from it…</p><p>“Oh my God, sweetheart, what happened to you?” He said moving inside, caressing your cheek and rapidly wrapping a tissue around your hand. You stood still in place, your mouth opened but no words came out… You felt his hand rest on your back and you reacted.</p><p>“I’m ok” You moved away from his touch “What are you doing here?” You answered with a hoarse voice</p><p>“I don’t even know where to start… I was an asshole…” You nodded immobile</p><p>“I’ll take it that you finally heard them…” He nodded</p><p>“I’m sorry doll… I was a coward, honestly I was afraid”</p><p>“Of what?”</p><p>“Losing you…” You started to feel your knees weak at his statement. “Right after you left, believe it or not Tony is who made me realize why I’ve been pushing you away and I feel like a complete idiot for it… Before you kick me out, please let me explain you everything”</p><p>“Go ahead”</p><p>“I didn’t lie to you when I said it was a difficult year. In the eyes of the world I might be a hero but trust me darling I’m a man with fears…When I saw those things attacking you I lost my mind, I thought I was going to lose you, just like Peggy and Bucky. Every time I saw you it was like living it all over again…I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t breathe…” He paused touching his face and resting his hand on the counter “I wanted to make you believe that I didn’t care anymore”</p><p>“What? Why?” You said with your arms crossed</p><p>“I thought that if I pushed you away as if I meant it you would leave me…”</p><p>“So, I would make things easier for you? Because it definitely wasn’t easy for me! I’ve cried my eyes out for you!” You yelled at him</p><p>“I know…I was a fool to believe that I could stop loving you…that I could just ignore what we have. I wish I could take it all away…” He said with teary eyes, he stood in front of you, you could feel his breath on your neck, his scent filling your senses…</p><p>“That is the problem, you can’t take it back! Your words and your actions stabbed me like a sword from side to side, you pushed it through me all the way in and then left me bleeding out to death… You turned your back on me, on us, and walked away…Do you know how many sleepless nights I spent? Do you know how many times I cried myself to sleep? You broke my heart!” You punched him on the chest, attempting to push him away, only to be wrapped by his strong arms</p><p>“And there hasn’t been a single second that I haven’t regretted my decision. I can’t ask you to forgive me, but I promise you that I’ll spend the rest of my life compensating you for it… I love you…” You heard him sniffle too, his grip tightening around you.</p><p>“Did you know that it’s the first time that you say it out loud? That you love me?” You sobbed on his chest, finally letting go clutching his shirt as if holding it for dear life</p><p>“I know…I made a mistake but I’ve learned from it. It might not be today but I hope that one day you’ll forgive me and trust me again” He kissed your temple, rubbing your lower back</p><p>“So, what are you going to do?” You got lost into his deep blue eyes</p><p>“I’m never letting you go again…” You both smiled, hugging each other</p><p>“You are still on your suit…Did you come here running all the way from the compound just to tell me all of that?”</p><p>“I did…You are the love of my life and the soon-to-be mother of my child”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you for reading! Feel free to follow me on Tumblr at https://www.tumblr.com/blog/angrybirdcr</p></blockquote></div></div>
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